This appeared in an Ann Landers column in September 1998.

Listen

Author Unknown

When I ask you to listen to me,
And you start giving me advice,
You have not done what I asked.

When I ask that you listen to me,
And you begin to tell me why I shouldn’t feel that way,
You are trampling on my feelings.

When I ask you to listen to me,
And you feel you have to do something to solve my problems,
You have failed me, strange as that may seem.

Listen: All that I ask is that you listen,
Not talk or do – just hear me.

When you do something for me
That I need to do for myself,
You contribute to my fear and feelings of inadequacy.

But when you accept as a simple fact
That I do feel what I feel, no matter how irrational,
Then I can quit trying to convince you
And go about the business
Of understanding what’s behind my feelings.

So, please listen and just hear me
And, if you want to talk,
Wait a minute for your turn – and I’ll listen to you.

One unexpected surprise while studying psychology has been the opportunity to enjoy favorite movies through a new lens. Currently I am the president of an honor’s society for psychology students (Psi Chi) at Clemson University. Since I love movies I took it as an opportunity to creat a movie series on campus to highlight psychology-themed movies. I compiled a growing list of recent movies that touch on a number of issues. Here is what I have so far. Let me know of any that I missed.

Continue reading Psychology Movies →

SETUP

Test the correctness of this rule by turning over as few cards as possible.

Rule: If the card has a vowel on one side then there is an even number on the other side.

You are then shown four cards with one letter or number printed on the side facing you. The letters and numbers you see are:

The goal is to turn over as few as possible and still test the truth of the rule. So which ones must you turn over?

Continue reading A Logic Puzzle →

Scenario 1:
It is the afternoon and you are the only passenger on a trolley going downhill. The brakes suddenly fail and there is no backup system. The situation causes the conductor to have a panic attack and he passes out. You do have the ability to steer the trolley but not stop it. You see a fork in the tracks coming up. If you do nothing then it is certain the trolley will kill five unaware people. If you intervene to choose the other set of tracks then the lives of the five people will be spared, but one person on the other set of tracks will be killed instead. What would you do?

Scenario 2
You are an amazing surgeon. Any surgery you perform WILL NOT FAIL. You have five people in need of transplants. One needs a heart, two need a lung and two patients need kidneys. Without these organs very soon all five will certainly die. By some stroke of luck one healthy person walked into the hospital. They are a perfect match to all five of your patients. Do you kill the one healthy person to save the five patients, or do you let the five die?

Continue reading Dilemma →

I read a lot and a wide variety of things interest me.  Since the early 90’s I’ve been reading about different aspects of psychology such as motivation, influence, fear, love, relationships, leadership and so on.  Some topics have come up so often that I mistakenly assume everyone is familiar with them.

Continue reading Psych Topics (Good & Bad) →